X-Men: War 3.0 - ROUND 1

Well… it’s Wednesday Night, you know what that means!

I mean… no, it means nothing. It means the middle of the week, it’s the same as all the other dumb days. UNTIL TODAY. Because today we play X-MEN: WAR!

[imagine epic music here crashing together epically]

So… I’m feelin’ a little rusty, not gonna lie. My X-Men War muscles are all atrophied and shit.

So, if you haven’t played with us before, it couldn’t be simpler, but if you want the history and context of the game, check out this post from 2022:

But it’s totally not necessary to do that. Just keep reading and vote for your favs in each match, simple as that. And feel free to make your thoughts known in the comments, I’d say keep it civil, but we’ve literally never had a problem with that so I am UNCONCERNED. You do unfortunately have to be a paid subscriber to vote and comment.

And then in a few days when all the voting has been calculated I’ll deal out a new round with the winners of this round — and we start the voting again for the survivors.

And we keep going until we have one triumphant X-Man to rule them all.

Okay, let’s get into it!

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ROUND ONE!

FIGHT 1: ARCHANGEL v MONET*

New Monet card art by Pepe Larraz

I guess it depends which Warren you get — but even if you get the hyper-powered angry one with the super deadly wings… well, I always found his anger as much of a distraction and weakness as a strength. So I’m not sure. He’s one of the original 5 and so I feel like that counts for a lot — and certainly gives him the edge in experience. But Monet is so… focused. Like in a way Warren has really NEVER been. Honestly? I think she’d clean his clock. I think he’d agree. ;D

*Oh - some of you have played before may remember that I mixed in some new cards I made with the originals — so if you see a card you don’t recognize from your misspent youth, it’s probably new, like the one above, of Monet. Fun, right? (Just say it’s fun so we can move along).

FIGHT 2: PSYLOCKE (KWANNON) v MEGGAN

So, if you haven’t been reading X-Men comics in a while. This Psylocke — Kwannon — is probably quite similar to the “ninja Betsy” you know from the 80s/90s. Similar power set, similar look, sometimes a similar costume. Kwannon, the woman Betsy was merged with in the late 80s (?), is now free and separate again — and currently going by the codename Psylocke as one of the X-Men. I love her.

I also love Meggan. But though Meggan has access to a boatload of power and can be a real player when she wants to, she just doesn’t have the killer instinct (or the fighting skills) Kwannon does. I think Kwannon would ultimately take this.

FIGHT 3: CAPTAIN BRITAIN (BETSY BRADDOCK) v MAGNETO

This new Captain Britain/Betsy Braddock art is by Davi Go

Aww. This is a bummer of a draw for Betsy’s first time in the game under her new name — Captain Britain (look for Brian later!) Magneto maybe the hardest pull in the whole deck. I think this is gonna knock her out pretty hard. Better luck next time, Bets. Fun card though, right?

FIGHT 4: CERISE v COLOSSUS

Okay. Don’t freak out on me, but I think I give this to Cerise. I know a lot of people aren’t as familiar with her powerset — but it’s pretty vast — Shi’ar Warrior trained, increased strength etc., and the creation and psionic control of energy forms — including blasts and creating constructs/shields/etc., she also has some high tech alien gear — particularly in her gloves.

But that’s not why I give it to her. As much as I love Piotr… he’s an artist and a poet and a farmer. Not a fighter. Like, he’s actually GREAT at fighting, but in his heart he wants to be somewhere else. Not Cerise, she’s a dyed in the wool hardcore Shi’ar warrior — she’s exactly where she wants to be (well, except for those times she was in a horrible prison camp — falsely accused btw!)

FIGHT 5: MYSTIQUE v HAVOK

I’m not underrating Havok when I say I think Mystique can take him, I think she’s wildly lethal and can take almost anyone. But I’m excited to have you guys yell at me about it. :D

FIGHT 6: WOLVERINE (LAURA) v LONGSHOT

New Laura Wolverine art by David Lopez

Oh, you’re so pretty Longshot, I’m sure you’ll still be pretty when you’re cut into little ribbons. T_T

FIGHT 7: DEADPOOL v BOOM BOOM

What a horrible horrible draw, Tabitha. I’ll miss you, girl.

FIGHT 8: WARPATH v SUNSPOT

This is a tough one for me. I feel like Sunspot’s raw power is impossible to deny here. But Warpath is no slouch. I feel like my affection is more with Warpath… but I think maybe Sunspot gets the win?

FIGHT 9: PIXIE v QUICKSILVER

New Pixie card art by Jay Anacleto

Hmmm. Bit of a blind spot for me. I find speedsters impossible to write (and even comprehend) and go out of my way to NOT do it. But part of that is because, executing it well… well, it seems like an impossible power to beat. And yet… if there’s ever a good power to fight against super speed it’s gotta be magic and the kind of weirdness that Pixie’s got going on, right? I might call this one a draw for lack of insight. What do you guys think?

FIGHT 10: DAZZLER v MULTIPLE MAN

Some Dazzler fans are gonna be mad, because I know they think she’s underrated (and I do too), but I think Madrox is SUPER underrated. That power is super cool and flexible and since Dazzler is also sort of like a part-time X-Man compared to Jamie, I think he takes this one. Excited for the comment section to tell me I’m crazy though!

It’s okay Ali and Longshot can commiserate at the losers table together.

FIGHT 11: BANSHEE v ARMOR

New Armor cart art by Mark Brooks

So, Armor is one of my favorite X-Men characters and it’s hard to be unbiased. I like Banshee and his power is cool, but it’s highly limited and Armor’s power is… not. I mean there are some downsides, but if she stays smart and doesn’t wear herself out, I think Sean is toast.

FIGHT 12: DOMINO v SHATTERSTAR

Wow. Great match up. I think Domino takes in the end, but man would you be excited to find out this was the match you were watching. Hell yeah.

FIGHT 13: CABLE v FORGE

I think this is a rough draw for Forge. He has a tough time in these match ups anyway since he’s less of an in-the-field fighter. But the things he’s great at could be game changers… except Cable is pretty good at some of those things too as he’s from the future and has a weird high-tech ship AND a weird techno-virus inside him since birth… so I’m guessing he’s pretty good with tech. As a result I think that shaves off whatever edge Forge might have had. I go Cable for this one. Sorry, Forge, I’ll always love you!

FIGHT 14: CANNONBALL v CYCLOPS

Hrm. I don’t like to underrate Cannonball, as I feel like that kind of happens a lot. But I think Senior Class ranking gets you a lot here. More experience and knowledge plus a huge comparable power? That experience and knowledge is the edge.

FIGHT 15: SPIRAL v BISHOP

New Spiral card art by Lau

So here’s the thing, Bishop. She has three freaking arms. She has cybernetic enhancements. She’s an incredible fighter (mostly with swords… which are not “absorbable energy” last I checked. She a “sorceress” that does spells … and y’know TBD on whether you can absorb that, but I’d say it’s probably case-by-case. Oh, and she teleports… celestial level teleporter! I think maybe she’s got you.

FIGHT 16: POLARIS v WOLFSBANE

FINALLY! For some reason Polaris has rotten luck and it feels like she always draws an absolute ringer in Round 1 and gets knocked out. But there’s no way she can’t take Wolfsbane — she’ll move to Round 2! Huzzah! Sorry, Rahne.

FIGHT 17: ICEMAN v CAPTAIN AVALON (BRIAN BRADDOCK)

New Captain Avalon/Brian Braddock cart art by Pepe Larraz

Hmmm. With old-timey Bobby, Brian would have this easily, but there’s no way to deny the incredible level up in Bobby’s powers over the last decade or two. Brian leveled up as Captain Avalon as well, but I’m less familiar with the specifics of that and I don’t think it’s wildly different than his power levels when he was Captain Britain. I think a little bit I feel like giving this to Brian, simply because Bobby doesn’t take things seriously enough (what am I, his mother? tsk). I think he’ll lose focus long enough for Brian to get him. But if he could buckle down… he COULD take it. Good match.

FIGHT 18: SIRYN v JEAN GREY

Oof. Rough draw Theresa. Great character, but she’s gonna get absolutely hammered by Jean Grey here I think.

FIGHT 19: PROFESSOR X v LILANDRA

Lilandra never does well in these to be honest (maybe I should take pity on her and retire her to space), but this is an exceedingly rough draw for her. Unless he’s missing his powers, Professor X takes this easily.

FIGHT 20: BEAST v FERAL

When you’ve got two “beast-type” characters that are going to have some similar physical assets I really think the edge largely goes to brains and experience. In this case, Hank has both over Maria. Sorry.

FIGHT 21: STORM v STRONG GUY

I actually think, like a lot of “comedy-leaning” characters, Strong Guy is hugely underrated. But not like… BEAT STORM UNDERRATED. Be serious. Storm all day.

FIGHT 22: WHITE QUEEN v FRENZY

New Frenzy card art by Russell Dauterman

Well, this is a fun match up, if only for the emotional/grudge-holding (Frenzy had a big crush on Cyclops for a while there and Emma… I’m going to go out on a limb is… not wild about that). But I think powers wise (and maybe strength of will too, no offense Frenzy) Emma comes out on top.

FIGHT 23: ROGUE v JUBILEE

Ah, Jubes. Happy landings, hope you land on something soft. I love you!

FIGHT 24: MAGIK v SHADOWCAT (KITTY PRYDE)

OOF. This is a great match up. You’d be excited (and a bit sad) to see this match. For me, it’s a pretty easy Magik win, but I know there are legions of Kitty Pryde fans that are gonna see it differently. Tell me all about it in the comments. lol

FIGHT 25: NIGHTCRAWLER v PHOENIX (RACHEL GREY)

If this was a popularity contest, Kurt gets my vote every time. Alas, it is not, and Rachel probably can deal with him in short order. :(

FIGHT 26: WOLVERINE (LOGAN) v SYNCH

New Synch card art by RB Silva

So… stay with me here. I know it seems like Synch is toast, but if you read the Children of the Vault X-MEN stories (some of my favorites from the Krakoa era) you know that Synch has actually been Wolverine LONGER THAN ANYONE, even Logan. Because Synch had Laura’s Wolverine powers in the Vault and time moves insanely in the vault, so he was Wolverine for hundreds of years (I think that’s right). Anyway, I don’t know that it’s enough to say he can beat the OG… but it’s a REAL fight in a way we maybe don’t expect. What a fun and unexpected draw.

FIGHT 27: MIRAGE v GAMBIT

New Mirage card art by Mahumud Asrar

I think Dani is actually a pretty tough fight for Remy. She’s got a distance weapon that she’s an absolute ace with — maybe even enough to give his speed/agility/reflexes a serious problem? I think he maybe takes it thanks to experience (and deviousness/playing dirty?)… but it’s a very good fight in my mind.

Okay! That wraps up Round One!

So these polls will be open for three days — and I’ll circle back on Saturday once the polls have closed for ROUND 2 voting.

Shout out in the comments about your favorite — and least favorite??? — matches. And don’t forget to show your work. ;D

Kelly